Before I got my job, I didn't spend a whole lot of time thinking about money. I was so broke, I couldn't even afford to think about money.
That's pretty broke.
Through a series of showers, holidays, and a few lucky breaks (and to be honest, a little help from my dad) I was able to take care of mine and Gemma's needs. Special treats were far and few between. Occasionally, I would be able to pick up a cheap sleeper from the clearance section at Target or a bite off of the dollar menu, but mostly, I spent nothing.
Surprisingly, I was fine with that. I got used to not spending money, so it wasn't really an issue, is just...was.
Does that make sense?
And then I got my job.
Luckily. I needed the job. I needed to be working. I wanted a job and I wanted to be working.
All of a sudden, money has become an issue again.
Save, spend, pay-off...There is a new huge stressor in my life.
I am challenged with decisions regarding what to pay and when (when, the money simply wasn't there before.)
I am challenged with deciding what thing that I need I should buy first (when, strangely enough, I didn't have those needs before.)
I am challenged with controlling Starbucks, and online shopping, and convenience food habits (when I had no bad money habits before.)
I will be honest in saying I am not good with money. I have a bit of debt, some of which I have no idea where it came from. I have no savings at all. I really like stuff.
But once again, motherhood is forcing me to want better for myself, to do better for myself. I want to get this money stuff straight, and will.
But for now, thinking about it makes my head hurt.
And baby sunglasses are totally a need right?
Ay yi yi!
What's your financial philosophy? And do you think I am totally tacky for discussing money here?