39 Days Until Baby

So I definitely have stretch marks on the OTHER side of my tummy now.

WTF.

When people asked me about whether or not I got stretch marks while I was pregnant I was supposed to be able to answer, "A few, just on one side though. They aren't bad at all!!!" and then do a big scrunchy eyed smile. It was going to be sweet.

Unfortunately my answer might end up being, "I look like I was ravaged by a hungry mountain lion all over my entire torso." Not so sweet.

I can't imagine how much worse they are going to be able to get in 6 more weeks if this is the progression in only 2!!!

I was looking at old pictures of me on facebook earlier today and I realized I was soooo tiny. Of course pre-pregnancy I thought I was ginormous but looking at the pictures my tummy is so small. I am wondering if I will ever look that way again.

Of course I daydream about looking way hotter than that after the baby. I daydream that after she is born I will find a way (and the motivation) to work out an hour and a half everyday... my boobs will stay huge and my belly (and all of it's stretch marks) will disappear. I will develop a tan and also somehow miraculously accquire perfect hair and an enormous, fashionable wardrobe. I will get the perfect job in some office (this part is a little fuzzy) where I meet an amazingly gorgeous professional man who is only 2 years older than me but well established. Said man will be excited to move his career to wherever I choose to go to law school and there he will support the baby and I until I graduate and become even more fabulous and super successful. My daughter will be happy and well adjusted and never ask about her "real daddy".

It is the life I am supposed to have really.

I should admit, this is how I fall asleep at night. I go through these random scenarios in my head. Usually I don't get far before I fall asleep. It is actually something I have done since I was really young to help myself sleep. It is like playing pretend in your head or something. The visuals aren't really that clear, it is more like thoughts. They really distract me from weird obsessive thoughts I have had since I was a kid.

I apologize for yet another emo-kid post.

I REALLY need to get busy.

Any suggestions on cheap, easy things to keep my time occupied until the baby comes???

-39 Days Until Baby