Friday, April 30, 2010

On the Last Day of April 2010

Stole this from Shelby at the Hollands.

And I just realized I forgot the first question.

Ooops!

The time is...
7:24 p.m.

Today I feel...
a little bummed that I have to work this weekend.

I am thinking...
that I need to make a doctors appointment. That I worry too much. That I wanna go home and smush my baby.

At the moment, I am thankful...
for having a loving (if dysfunctional) family.

I am going...
nowhere fast? Jay Kay, Jak Kay. I am going to have to do some more soul searching soon.

I am wearing...
a gray tee shirt, with a patterned tank top underneath, black dress pants, and red flats with a bow.

I wish...
I could fall in love with a career path. And a man. Yes, both...I'm greedy.

I am reading...
not much that isn't online lately, I am embarassed to admit. I should bring a book to work with me, but the computer is so darn tempting (I try to really limit internet when I am home!)

I am working on...
figuring out where to start working...

I am hoping...
this weekend goes by smoothly, and that I am able to make the best of it.

I am hearing...
only the hum of the computer and the clack of my typing.

Around the house...
needs some attention A.S.A.P.

I bet you didn't know...
that I just ordered a bunch of (cheap) make up online, that I still can't afford.

One of my favorite...
CD's albums ever was Country Grammar by Nelly.

What are you up to today?

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Like a Hawk

I have admitted before, that I don't know a lot about babies. I'd find specific examples for you but...well, I'm lazy.

The funny thing I have learned about being a mom (well, one of the funny things) is that you really don't have to know that much about babies. Because you learn. You figure it out. You read a book. You follow your instincts. You take advice. It works.

So, in my combined reading/instincts/figuring out, I have decided that I want to make sure to let Gemma explore as much of the world as she safely can.

Basically, I let her play with random stuff, that isn't her toys. But that is still safe. It's a win-win situation because she is excited to play with something new, and I don't have to go find an actual toy.

(Spoiler Alert! The above is not really a declaration of a parenting choice, but instead preemptive justification for the events that follow.)

Well yesterday, I was in my room. trying to make it through the ginormous laundry basket that is Gemma's crib, when I heard a knock at the door.

The new debit card, that I had ordered came.

I grab the card and go back upstairs. I return  to Mount Laundry, and Gemma is playing happily with the big envelope the card came in.

A few minutes later I hear...

choking.

Oh, sh*t! Craaaaaaaap.

Her face is red. She looks scared.

I'm scared.

I run down the stairs.

Why am I downstairs?

She's still choking.

I stick my hand in her mouth.

Wait, aren't I not supposed to do that? Something about scratching her throat or something.

Craaaaaaaap.

She's still choking.

I pulled my hand out, panicked, and look...

A strip of the paper is stuck to the roof her mouth, and she is gagging. I scoop the paper out with my finger (gently).

She returns to normal. Crisis averted.

Two hours later...

I give Gemma a plastic block. She's playing happily on my bed. I sit on the edge of the bed, facing out, straightening my hair.

I hear squeals of laughter. I turn around, thinking she must really love that block.

She has the laptop cord. In her mouth.

Craaaaaaaap.

Lessons learned:
  1. Don't let baby chew on cardboard.
  2. Even idiots know not to let babies chew on cardboard.
  3. I really should have known better, than to let her chew on cardboard.
  4. Unnattended laptop cords can be just as dangerous a cardboard.
  5. Now that she is more mobile, I have to watch her like a hawk...especially around cardboard.
Does anybody else remember when their baby first started getting into trouble? Or does anyone else have a cardboard horror story to share?

Guilty Inquiring minds want to know.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Happy 8 Months Gemma


Happy 8 months pretty baby! This month has been such a sweet time with you. I have enjoyed it so much. You are the sweetest, silliest, funniest human being I have ever met. 

Ever.

You are a huge ham, and literally break out into a HUGE smile whenever the camera comes out. Unless you are concentrating hard on something else, which you tend to do. I think concentrating is your second favorite thing in life, just after smiling.




Again, I am at a loss to say what really stood out for me about this month. We just started baby swim today! That was fun! Also, the weather is finally warming up (sometimes), so I am able to take you outside a lot more. It is interesting for me to see how you interact with new surroundings. I enjoy seeing your face light up when the breeze blows, or seeing you raise your eyebrows at an animal scurrying by, or even your awkward uncomfortable-ness (yes, I'm mean), when I plopped you in the grass sans blanket for the first time. Many moms have said this before, but I like seeing you, see the world.

Down to the nitty-gritty stuff, that probably only I care about...

You sleep good at night. We still co-sleep, and I am okay with that. You nap well enough. Usually, either in the car on someone's lap. You aren't the kind of baby that you can plop down and they fall asleep. I am pretty sure I am the one to blame, and again, I'm okay with that.




You are definitely not loving the Excersaucer as much as you used to. You are at a strange in between stage, where you want to explore the world, but you still don't want to leave mama's lap. It is endearing and frustrating at the same time. I think you get frustrated too, because, come on... there is only so much you can do on my lap!

When you are on the ground, you roll all over. You can also sit up pretty well, and you don't fall over when you get excited. You aren't crawling, but that's cool. All in your own time, right?

You have grown so much recently, I can hardly believe you are the same baby sometimes. You are huge. Well…to me at least! I have no idea how much you weigh anymore, but I would guess…18-20 pounds? That seems right. You are tall too. I am buying all of your clothes in 6-12, 9 month, or 12 month sizes. I especially need the larger sizes for your pants and sleepers. You are seriously long legged.

Your diapers are still size 3. I like the diapers from Costco. Cuz they're cheap.

I swear the moment I started giving you solid food is when you started to grow so much. I know that they say that the first 6 months of solids are mainly just for practice in eating, but I think you have grown so much more in the months that you have been on them. Maybe it is just a coincidence?

You have tried pretty much every baby food in a jar. I had high hopes of making all of your babyfood myself, and then one day I read the ingredients on a jar of food…it said sweet potatoes and water. After that, I gave myself permission to feed you jar food, although I do always read the labels. You also eat random chunks of fruit (like cantelope slices), bits of other things I am eating that are baby friendly, baby mum mums, formula, and you still nurse 2-3 times a day. So yeah…you eat a lot.



Your hair is growing longer and thicker by the day. It wisps up around your ears, and you still have an extra long strip of down the middle of your head. I am excited to see what color it will be, it is so hard to tell with baby hair. I am pretty sure it is lighter than mine.

Your eyes are lighter too, and they still aren't completely brown. Still, still changing?

Oh, and you still only have two teeth. I love your little teeth.

Except when they are digging into the side of my face. One of your favorite games is to grab me by the hair, and pull my face to you so that you can bite it. Yes, it is just as painful as it sounds. Could you please stop that? I try to move away but I get outsmarted by an infant. Seriously.

Physical abuse aside, I love, love, love being your mama. It is an honor and a privilege. I only hope that I can be the mama that you deserve in the months and years to come. 

Every step of the way, I am excited to see you grow, and watch how you change me too. You make me better, stronger, smarter, happier, and maybe even more beautiful.

You really are my precious Gem.

Forever and Always,

Mama

                                                    
                  

Monday, April 26, 2010

Just to Hear Myself Type

Hey y'all!

If you are looking for anything of substance, please click away! I have been up to a, "whole lotta nothing," as we like to say around here. Or maybe everywhere...does everybody say that?

I did not have to work this weekend so of course...it rained. Well, in all honesty it rained Saturday, but Sunday was a nice day. Gemma and I went shopping for bathing suits.

The horror...I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't that. Bathing suit shopping for myself ended up being much harder than I had expected. Maybe that will be the reality check that I need to really get myself into shape.

There is no excuse for the way I look right now.

None.

On a more positive note, I lost my debit card. Oh wait, that isn't positive either. Actually it sucks. Seriously...I lose eeeeverrrrryyyyyy thing. And it needs to stop. ASAP.

How's a girl to online shop without a debit card?

Are you still reading this mess? As I said, today...I've got nothing.

But tomorrow, Water Babies starts AND Gemma turns 8 months old...

So maybe tomorrow, I will have something.

=)

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Getting to Know ME...Some More

I have been suffering from a serious case of bloggers block since mid-last week, so I thought that participating in Getting to Know You, at the MannLand5 might help remedy it. Plus, I was probably going to do it anyway!


1. If you could star in any movie genre..what would it be..romance..horror..comedy..suspense or action?

Romantic Comedy. I like to laugh. And I need a boyfriend.


2. Do you recycle?

Well, when I am out, and it is right in my face. I don't have a recycling system set up at home though.         I suck.

3. Have you ever been to a strip club?

Um, yes actually. I live sort of close to West Virginia, and when I was 18-20, the strip clubs in West Virginia were the only local "clubs" that I could get into, if I wanted to go out. You had/have to be 21 for all of the regular clubs. Did I mention that in West Virginia the strip clubs are full nude? 

I am not proud of myself.

4. Do you have a nickname?

Yes! I have a whole bunch of silly nicknames that wouldn't mean anything to anyone except the people who call me them. I don't have a shortened version of my name that I prefer to go by though.

5. What's a name you can't stand to be called?

Umm...Uhh...Pass?

6. What are your Summer staples?

I would probably say... Iced tea, flip flops, and air conditioning. I'm low maintenance.

7. What was the last thing you bought for yourself?

Technically, it was a chicken tostada at Taco Bell :/, but that is pretty boring. I actually spent more money on myself today than I probably have in months...I bought a pair of Bermuda shorts, a pair of boyfriend crops,  two t-shirts, a bathing suit, and a pair of board shorts. I also bought myself two pairs of flats at K Mart someplace real fancy, yesterday.

8. Are you happy with your boob size?

Not really. It is kind of shallow, but I definitely wish I was a little...fuller.


Let's hope that did the trick, and the blogger's block will go away and I can come back to my post crazy self. 

Take care y'all and enjoy what is left of your weekend!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Things that Keep Me Up at Night

  • Contemplating what I want to do in the future professionally, and what steps I need to take to get there.
  • Being anxious about the time that I am wasting because I can't take any steps towards my future, because I really have no clue what I want to do.
  • Wondering if I will ever be able to get myself out of stupid debt, that I can barely account for.
  • Feeling insecure about my body, and the way I present myself to the world.
  • Hoping I am not stuck living at home forever.
  • Being afraid of what happens when you die.
  • Not feeling capable of protecting Gemma from...life.
  • Wishing I could better manage my time.
  • Fretting over a messy house.
  • Thinking I may never get married, that I may never find "the one."
  • Missing friends.
  • Wanting new friends.
  • Shame.
  • Trying to figure out how I got here.
  • Making mental lists of things I want to do, need to do, should have done, could have done, and all variations.
I am out of sorts. But she holds me together. I know this will pass. The thoughts and feelings will change. I am riding it out now. Somehow, even with all of these thoughts, I am happy.

I consider her, and I sleep.

What keeps you up at night?

Monday, April 19, 2010

First, I Would Like to Thank Jesus...



I won an award! Thank you so much,  I Love You to the Moon Mommy! I have recently found her blog, and love reading about her and her Fairy Princess.

The rules of this particular award are:

1. Copy and paste the award on your blog.
2. List who gave the award to you and use a link to her/his blog (or hyperlink).
3. List 10 things that make you happy
4. Pass the award on to other bloggers and visit their blog to let them know about the award.
 
My list of things that make me happy (in no particular order):
  1. Weekends off of work.
  2. Naps (both mine and Gemma's are quite nice.)
  3. Festivals and Fairs. Games, rides, greasy food...what more could a girl want?
  4. Being barefoot.
  5. Aimless walks with good friends.
  6. A clean house.
  7. Chocolate covered frozen bananas.
  8. Kittens and most other cute wittle baby animals.
  9. Winning. (most of the time, of course, its not always a good thing.)
  10. Unexpected kindness.
And now, to pass it on. Crap. I hate this part of awards, just because I never know who to pick. What if they don't "do" awards? And what if they don't like me? Crap!

Hmm....Well if growing up in a broken home has taught me anything, it is that love is conditional (I'm joking I promise, but I needed a segue...)  so this is what I will do. I have 3 questions that have been weighing heavily on my mind, and if you comment with an answer, you can take the award. Because you make me happy. And you deserve it. And I know if I say, "whoever wants the award, take it, " no one will take the award, because who really wants an award they didn't earn. Right?

Can you tell I am tired today?

So, my 3 conditions questions:
  1. Gemma is almost 8 months old, and I realize I haven't been giving her as many finger foods as I should. Do you have any suggestions for things that make good finger foods?
  2. I need a pair of black flats and a camera case. Any links to cute suggestions online?
  3. Every weeknight, I work from 5-9. Thanks to this strange schedule, my eating patterns have gone crazy. So, if you were me, what times would you eat? I usually wake up around 8 or so, and I am a 3 meals a day kind of girl...for some reason, I just can't figure it out! Also, do you have any ideas for dinners that can be thrown together really quickly and easily, when I get home at night?
Thanks for your help y'all! And I realize #2 and #3 are both two questions in one, so if you answer any part of them, feel free to take the award. Or really, if you are reading this, you can just take the award...but I am pretty sure you won't do that...right?