I Want...

to be better

to  be more patient

to be stronger

to be prettier

to be more brave

to be more resolute

to be able to "go for it"

to be enough

to be over the hump

I want to be my best self.

For my daughter and myself.

I want to fix it all.

The Day After Christmas

I didn't think I was in a  post-Christmas-funk , until this evening when I became the grumpiest grump that ever lived. I refuse to believe that it has anything to do with my winning personality, so post-Christmas-funk it is.

Not me.

For realz.

Oh, and Gemma has been possessed by a demon,

I hear, "I'm Hungry!" (pronounced Ahh'm Houwngreee) eight hundred and seventy five thousand times a day. Most of the time she doesn't eat anything she is just bored. Or pushing buttons. Or both. But very rarely hungry.

Here she really was hungry:

Here too:

Here, not so much:

Thank God for Dora. She is basically co-parenting at this point. Well, not really, but Dora helps me get a little me time every now and again.

Of course, she doesn't watch enough t.v. for it to be bad, in case anyone was judging me.

Or, at least I hope not.

Dang, now I am judging myself.

Kind of like I judged myself when this happened:

What kind of mom gives their kid juice in bed? And then turns on the light while their angel sleeps and takes a crappy cell phone pic of it?

*I'm shamefully raising my hand.

I will leave you with 2 pieces of good news...

I got all A's this semester! 

Except for one was an A-, which nobody thought I deserved (the teacher and special instructor both thought I was doing "perfectly" and should have gotten an A) but somehow I still received. Grr...

and...I bought a kitchen table!

Which wouldn't be such exciting news if it weren't for the fact that Gemma and I have been eating picnic style on the floor since August when we moved to the new apartment.

Sooo...woo hoo...I guess. 

My good news made me annoyed again.

Oh well, it is totally just because it is the day after Christmas.

Tomorrow will be better fo sho.