Fevers, Tantrums, and Rainy Days

It's be a little quiet here this week. It has been quiet at home too. Well, sort of. It has been quiet if quiet means that you don't have any fun at all and just care for a flaming hot, fussy, almost one year old while watching Mr. Hollands Opus and eating steak flavored potato chips then all has been...quiet.

Starting Wednesday evening until about 10 a.m. this morning Gemma has been running a temperature that stayed around 101-102 degrees. Last night, it spiked to over 103, and I had a mini mommy meltdown but then came to the conclusion that the only thing I could do was wait it out for morning, when I could call the pediatrician and go buy Motrin to give her in addition to the Tylenol she had been getting. Luckily, by 10 a.m. when we woke up (sooo late, oh my goodness!) her fever had begun to go down and by early afternoon she was almost completely herself.

I am blaming the whole ordeal on teething, because well...I don't know what else would explain it. She had just been at the docs and her ears/nose/throat and everything else was checked, and she is cutting new teeth, so there ya go. Teething it is. Who cares if Dr. Google says teething won't cause temperatures that high.

The weather has been rainy and demotivating all day. I had to coax myself into going to get my paycheck cashed. There is a special kind of lazy that doesn't feel like going to get money.

*sigh*

My lazy, somberness has followed me here to work where the best I can do is yawn and eek out this post.

Maybe being off this weekend will be enough to cheer me up =)

See ya Monday....

p.s. I hardly mentioned the tantrums I promised in the title of this post. I will say that Gemma wasn't the only one throwing them.

(Mostly) Wordless Wednesday

My sweet waking baby....

really is becoming a teenager all too fast.

On a sidenote, my dad called her dollar store t-shirt PJ's redneck. I called it economical.

Hi!

I just wanted to say HI!

See ya tomorrow =)

(This picture is NOT Gemma, I found it here while Google-ing  "cute")

Getting to Know ME! (It's Been a While!)

1. Do you think mustaches are sexy?

Nope. They remind me of my daddy.

2. What's the last concert you've been to?

Oh geez. I honestly can't remember. It would definitely be when I was still in school and there is about a 99% chance it was rap music. I haven't been to a concert in a couple of years, how sad!

3 What was your favorite 80's sitcom?

Hands Down:

Close Second:

Ooops, I mean:

4. Were you named after anyone?

There is a family rumor that my first name was chosen because of the show Cagney and Lacey:

but I don't really believe it. My middle names are "borrowed" though, the first was my mom's best friend and the second is my grandmother's name.

5. When you buy new clothes, do you wash before wearing?

Nope.

6. If you didn't blog, what would you do with your spare time?

Oh gosh. There is life outside of blogging? How dare you suggest such things!!!

7. What is your favorite department store?

Hmm. I used this list to choose from. Well, growing up, we only had J.C. Penny, Sears, and Belk to choose from, and honestly I think I like them all the same.

8. If you were to get Laser Hair Removal..where would you get it?

My eyebrows and lip area. Oh, the sorrows of having dark hair...

Sunshine Award!

I received and awesome Sunshine Award from Sarah at Fanged Faerie Princess.

The award is for bloggers who spread happiness and light, and although I have been slacking in the happiness and light categories lately, today is a good day...

I think the sunshine is back =)

(P.S. I need the sunshine so I am keeping it for myself, award rules be darned!)

Today, I am working. I am in an awesome mood for no good reason...

Life this week has been pretty much focused on the things I mentioned in my last post... Party planning, playroom planning, and fostering the last 3 of the litter of kittens I took in.

Party planning is going great. I have a cake ordered, plates, streamers, goodie buckets (that don't match the party, but whatevs). I still need to decide on a definite menu and figure out how to make it happen. I am definitely doing tacos, but I need to choose recipes to use, and make lists of things to buy. I also want a few extra sweet treats, so I need to figure that out. I need to rent the helium tank, buy baloons, and print out any of the paper decorations that I ordered from Etsy...oh and I have to buy shells and spray paint and work on my centerpieces...so yeah, there is work to be done, but I have faith I can do it in three weeks!

The playroom stuff is going well too. This is what I have ordered so far:

I really want this rug:

but the rug is 6'5" x 4'4" and the room is 10'x11', so I am worried it might be too small for a playroom. Whaddya think?

As far as the kittens go, I have finally gotten attached (they hid a lot the first few days that I had them,) and now they are going to their forever home today. (Crossing my fingers)

I haven't been able to get any cute pictures of them, because they basically look like little black fluffballs and my photog skills are probably on par with those of a drunk toddler, so umm yeah...just believe me when I say that they are cute. And sweet. And squishy.

Aww...kitty's =)

In other sunshine-y news, it is lunch time, and I am leaving this desk and enjoying the sunshine for a bit!

Happy 11 Months (and SEVEN days) Gemma!

Okay, so I am a little late in writing this this month....ya wanna know why?

My dear sweet babe has been replaced with a wild woman. I am convinced that I am now caring for a reckless teenager trapped in the body of an almost one year old. She is argumentative, stubborn, exceedingly emotional. She is into everything, and the more she knows it isn't a good idea, the more intriguing it seems.

Seriously, is this pre-toddlerhood already? Because if so, I think I am going to need a few days to stockpile supplies and come up with a game plan because it is about to get crazy... This little lady is taking over the world! Or my world. Either way, wowza!

Thank God for the cute, sweet moments that almost definitely make up for the hard times. Especially the baby hugs and kisses. I think I pretty much exist for her sweet hugs where she rests her head on my shoulder, or her kisses where it seems as if she is trying to bite my lips off.

Yep, that's what I live for.

Crap, I just deleted the best picture when I was trying to delete this one:

Oh, well.

This month for me has been marked by the assertion of your independence, your crazy mobility, and your 4 sweet teeth (and two more that have just popped through!) I feel like it has definitely been a small preview of what's to come when my bitty baby becomes a teeny toddler, and of course, I am excited and terrified all at the same time.

As far as the boring stuff:

You recently have decided that sleeping is for fools. You fight naps, and don't like to go to sleep at night really. Most of my attempts at moving you  to the crib after you have fallen asleep are thwarted. Oh geez. After some serious consideration and soul searching I have decided ultimately that I will not try a "cry it out" or "Ferber Method" approach to getting you to sleep better, or any other method of sleep training method for that matter,  so...I guess it is what it is...but work with me dear, okay?

You are so over any sort of baby contraptions, and you even hate the little gate that I bought to try and keep the beast (well, you) contained, so pretty much you crawl wherever, and pull up on anything within reach.  You especially like the T.V. in my our room, where you can reach the buttons and turn the t.v. off and on. I am not so fond of that game. I do enjoy watching you cruise furniture and watching you figure out how to sit down can actually be funny sometimes.

I have no clue how much you weigh right now...my best guess would be around 18 pounds and you are still so tall! You wear size 3 diapers, and mostly size 12 months clothes. You pretty much live in dresses, rompers, and a few little shorts sets and that size seems to work in everything...

Your hair is decidedly dirty blond for now, and it is cute but I still not-so-secretly hope that you get my dark hair one day. I mean, you are obviously still gorgeous so it doesn't really matter but, um, please? Your eyes are a dark brown, and they still have a ring around them, however the ring around your eyes in now brown too.

There isn't really a need to mention food anymore as pretty much everything has been fair game, and you seem to enjoy most things equally. Your diet consists of a lot of Cheerio's, bananas, grilled chicken, pasta, rice, and other fruits and veggies, but you also get table food when we are home together for dinner but that is rare.

I'm sad to see so much of who you were slowly fade away, but seeing you become your own person is so exciting that it makes me feel so much better. You make me laugh, you make me smile, and sometimes you make me pull my hair out, but I am not exaggerating one bit when I say that the more I get to know you the more my love grows and grows.

I love you with my whole heart, and then some.

Forever and ever,

Mama 

Me Me Me Monday-2

I'm already not looking forward to this post.

Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe that just proves that this exercise is going to push me out of my comfort zone. Maybe.

Or maybe I just don't want to admit that I have done absolutely nothing on the self improvement front in the past week.

Things I have done in the past week include:

• Witness a drug bust at my neighbor's house.
• Rescue and rehome a litter of kittens.
• Tour Gemma's birthday party hall, and make a list of things left to do/buy.
• Watch everything on my DVR.
• Began cleaning a spare room and shopping for what will become Gemma's playroom.

See. No self improvement there.

Things I didn't do this week:

• Send a very important fax.
• Go to the gym and/or eat right.
• Seriously consider where I want to be professionally in the future.
• Make up a game plan for life in general.
• Or anything else that was productive to my future.

I think I am slowly sinking into a rut. Or maybe, I am just now looking up at the world and realizing that I'm already in a rut. It's okay though, I think it is only human to get to these places, I just really need to get myself out.

The problem is, I really feel like all I need to do is put one foot in front of the other in the direction that I want to go, but since I have no idea where I want to go, I just stand here...spinning in circles...digging my hole (err, rut) deeper.

Where is this lifeplan at? I've done some soul searching, and I've come up empty. I just want to love and be loved and be surrounded by beautiful things like everyone else in the world...how does that translate into reality? Into a future? Into my future?

What am I to do when I keep digging deeper and deeper and yet I still come up empty handed?

There is a crude expression that I grew up hearing...basically it's poo or get off the pot (I don't need to translate, do I?) The thing is, I don't want to get off of my proverbial pot. I don't want to stop here...just me and the baby, living at home, with a job that's okay I guess...

What can I do?

Where can I go?

I keep telling myself that there is time, but each time I say it now, it seems like more and more of a lie.

So I guess I will sit here, and hope it comes (ewww) before life forces me off the pot ...